Barring the unforseen, such as an urgent need to bomb Iraq or a last-minute intern eruption, the Senate may reach a verdict today on the articles of impeachment against the president. With acquittal almost certain and lest this long national nightmare be for naught, it is time to reflect upon the lessons learned.

It was never about infidelity; it was about lying. If he’d only come clean at the start, all would have been forgiven. A caveat to the average Joe: don’t try this at home.

With practice, and perhaps the aid of a good voice coach, it is possible to say the words “William Jefferson Clinton” in a tone usually reserved for describing gunk found stuck to the bottom of one’s shoe.

Monica Samille Lewinsky, in the considered opinion of the House managers, is a bright, sincere and innocent young woman. Flashing undies at a married man is considered a gesture of friendly greeting in civilized society; only a depraved hick from Arkansas could misinterpet it as a come-on.

Bipartisanship means different things to the two chambers of Congress. In the House, it’s voting the party line and publically excoriating the other side for doing the same. In the more dignified Senate, it’s voting the party line and pretending to excoriate the other side behind closed doors.

Speaking of shoe gunk, Kenneth Starr demonstrated that with $50 million and a mandate to investigate a failed real-estate deal, an obsessing prude can prove that a president first elected as a confessed scoundrel is, in fact, a scoundrel. The spinoffs — a major dent in the Republican House majority, the political demise of two speakers, the outing of several GOP philanderers and the possible end of the independent counsel law — come at no extra charge.

The framers of the Constitution wisely left the impeachment and removal of a president for undefined “high crimes and misdemeanors” in the hands of Congress and not the criminal courts so that factors such as the good of the country and the will of the people could be considered. Despite opinion polls consistently showing strong support for the president and even stronger opposition to his ouster, his opponents said all along they would vote their conscience and not be swayed. In other words, the only poll that counts is the one held every two years. Six for the Senate.

With the 2000 presidential campaign under way, the country can only hope that candidates take something away from this. Such as: If you have any indiscretions, misdeeds or weak moments in your past, out with them. Confess before it’s too late. The morality police know everything. Or: Don’t run for president if you don’t also qualify for sainthood.

As this sorry episode lurches to a conclusion, the sternest congressional critics of the president have consoled themselves with the thought that William Jefferson Clinton is only getting a free pass because the economy is so robust. It’s an obvious lesson, but one worth repeating: Americans are a selfish people. The contest between prosperity and zealotry is no contest. The good times will win every time.