“Diary of a Tragedy” is a column written by New York City residents with Maine ties who have been sharing their experiences of the World Trade Center tragedy. Rita Sullivan grew up in Bangor where she attended St. John’s School, Garland Street School (now William Cohen School) and Bangor High School. She was named Miss Maine Basketball in 1991. She currently lives in Manhattan and works for the Women’s National Basketball Association.

For the nearly five years that I’ve lived in New York City, I’ve always considered myself an extended tourist. I’ve taken in the sights and sounds, I’ve reveled in the energy and vitality of the city, but I’ve never truly considered it my home.

It makes sense that I never felt a real sense of solidarity with those around me. I’m a Red Sox fan, for one. There’s a little too much L.L. Bean in my wardrobe. And, on the elevator, I attempt to say good morning to people I don’t even know, the kind of thing you do regularly in a small city like Bangor.

On Sept. 11, all that changed as my co-workers and I gathered at the window of our office to watch the horror unfold on the southern tip of Manhattan. When you witness something like that in person, there’s no way you can’t take it personally. And when you watch a city react the way New York has, watch people pitch in to help, watch people you care about grieve, there’s no way you can’t feel it personally.

The somber silence that has enveloped the city has communicated more to me than any single word uttered over the past five years. For the first time, I am a New Yorker. The way the city has come together will forever be etched in my memory, and New York and its citizens will forever remain in my heart.