ESPN’s announcers should quit the shtick and report sports news straight

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Idle thoughts while waiting for the players and management to screw baseball into the ground.

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I’m happy that ESPN had its 25,000th SportsCenter.

Congratulations.

Can we now move on? And while we’re moving can we move to a place where the scores and stories are told without the endless self-promotions and standup routines?

It’s everywhere we look. A basketball highlight includes a dunk that is timed out with an announcer yelling BOOYEAH (don’t tell me I misspelled booyeah – it is a non-word and therefore cannot be misspelled).

BOOYEAH is obviously as important as the shot. Why else would it be included? Why would we watch? Why would the announcer’s producers and managers allow him to shout BOOYEAH if it was not as important as the action it is supposed to be describing.

But this isn’t strictly about ESPN’s Stuart Scott, he who puts the BOO in BOOYEAH. Scott is simply part of it.

ESPN’s announcers, with few exceptions, are part stand-up comedians. They must be. A pitcher, after giving up a home run, is ridiculed. A fielding error is joked about. Everything is funny.

Gone are the days of the straight report. Everyone must have a shtick. Whether it’s Kenny Mayne’s eclectic style, which sometimes goes over the heads of his viewers, or Rich Eisen’s cool, they’ve got it.

Personally, I long for the days of the Charley Steiner-Bob Ley-John Saunders SportsCenter, where things were mostly done straight (except on the few occasions that Steiner completely lost it and broke into uncontrollable laughter).

Having those guys back on a regular basis would be “cooler than the other side of the pillow.”

In the words of Ray Romano, “SWEET SASSY MOLASSY.”

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Just a glimpse of the Little League World Series championship Sunday was enough. In between innings, Louisville pitcher Aaron Avley’s shoulder was being stretched and receiving heat treatment.

While former major leaguer Harold Reynolds and future Hall of Famer Tony Gwynn repeatedly questioned the wisdom of allowing the pitcher to continue, Alvey pitched the complete game.

Everybody in this business has a story about a kid who was overused in youth baseball. I call it the “might have been” list.

The argument will always rage as to how many pitches is too many for a 12-year-old pitcher.

To dismiss a coach or manager as uncaring and driven only by the win is too easy. Most coaches and managers care about their players, and that’s a large part of why some do the job.

Alvey and his coach got what they wanted – a Little League World Series championship.

Here’s hoping Alvey doesn’t land on this cynical sportswriter’s “might have been” list.

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The U.S. freestyle wrestling team’s decision not to attend the world championships being held in Iran because of security concerns reminds me of another time Americans did not go abroad to play games.

It was 1980 and the Summer Olympics were held in Moscow. President Jimmy Carter decided that the United States would boycott the Games because of the Soviet Union’s invasion of Afghanistan.

Carter was also in a heated race with Ted Kennedy for the Democratic Party’s nomination for president. The election (in which Carter ultimately lost to Ronald Reagan) was held later that year.

The race between Carter and Kennedy was so heated that late night talk show host Johnny Carson quipped at the time during one of his monologues (paraphrased) – President Jimmy Carter has had a change of heart and will allow the U.S. Olympic team to travel to Moscow, as long as Teddy Kennedy drives the bus.

Booyeah.

Don Perryman can be reached at 990-8045, (800) 310-8600 or dperryman@bangordailynews.net.