The first thing about 96 percent of the world’s computer users see every time they go on-line is the Microsoft Internet Explorer MSN home page, a breezy mix of news, features ‘n fun. The first thing that vast majority saw this week – along with the secret for getting “fab abs” (Web people talk that way) – was the “worst state to run a biz.”

For about 99.9 percent of that 96 percent, clicking that link led to a report on bad things happening to other people somewhere else. For people in Maine, clicking that link was a lot like hitting with a hammer the thumb that still throbs from getting hit a dozen times before. The report, by MSN business writer Philipp Harper, was painful yet informative. In addition to surveying well-known studies that rank states by the degree to which taxation and regulatory policies make it hard to do business (Maine is the second worst), Mr. Harper looked at some less-publicized research on how states actually encourage creativity, innovation, the entrepreneurial spirit, that sort of thing.

On that worseness scale, Maine is second to none. Ouch. Maine state government has its flaws, but it is unfailingly cooperative in providing supporting evidence for its bad-for-biz reputation. So it came as no surprise to learn this week, thanks to a gushing press release, that the Maine Office of Tourism has awarded its advertising services contract to an agency in New York City.

These services have always been provided by Maine firms and for 14 of the last 17 years by one particular firm -the Swardlick Marketing Group of Portland. It didn’t take long for news to sweep through Maine’s advertising community that a taxpayer-funded piece of business ($1.9 million per year, renewable for three years at the Office of Tourism’s discretion) was headed out of state. This particular segment of Maine’s creative, innovative, entrepreneurs was doubly disgruntled: this out-of-state choice was an insult to all in-state advertising agencies; a lot of work previously subcontracted to other Maine creative types – photographers, filmmakers, illustrators, copywriters, printers – might go out-of-state as well.

The disgruntlement hit the fan with such force that by week’s end, the Office of Tourism followed up with another press release – no gushing, very defensive – to explain itself. The explanation, in distilled form, is that the decision on who will run the Maine Office of Tourism’s advertising campaign is beyond the Maine Office of Tourism’s control. The 10 proposals (six by Maine firms) were reviewed and judged by a panel of “six Maine taxpayers” (five private citizens and one state employee) and it was their collective judgment that sending $1.9 million of their tax dollars to New York City was a small price to pay for advertising excellence.

Further, the office explains, it would have been unwise, even impossible, for those six Maine taxpayers to give an edge to the six Maine taxpaying firms. Any sign of bias would have resulted in retaliatory bias by the state of the aggrieved bidder against Maine, “which could potentially cut off sources of lucrative contracts for Maine businesses, which could have a devastating effect on Maine business and the state itself.”

It’s probably already occurred to you that retaliation only works if the other side has something to retaliate with and it’s hard to think of anything the government of New York buys from Maine in any quantity to matter – there is no Empire State Lobster Feed, for example. It may have occurred to you that, especially in something as subjective as ad campaigns, these six Maine taxpayers wouldn’t have to be blatant in their bias toward Maine firms – a little winking and nudging and we could have bought a perfectly suitable campaign that would have kept the money and jobs here. It certainly has occurred to you that, in the name of worrying about some theoretical devastating effect on Maine business, the Maine Office of Tourism has brought about a very real one.

I spoke with David Swardlick, head of the Portland agency the other day, and he was about as philosophic and understanding as one could expect under the circumstances – it’s a competitive world out there, Maine cannot be provincial in its efforts to improve its economy, he appreciates the opportunity his company has had to promote Maine tourism and looks forward to doing it again.

The other side, however, is that this contract, the switch from an agency in Maine to one in New York, is big news in the advertising industry: “There’s a lot of pride in this industry here in Maine and, now, a lot of disappointment,” said Mr. Swardlick. “It certainly does send a bad signal that Maine firms cannot provide a competitive level of quality.”

Especially since it is hard to imagine Maine being able to withstand the assumed goal of the presumed superior ad campaign it has just bought – more tourists. We’re already up to here with them, the Turnpike is no sooner widened than it’s clogged with more of them, there are no vacancies for them for much of the year and increasingly not enough workers to serve them. If ever there was a case of, to tweak the old saying, fixing something that ain’t broke, this would be it.

Incidentally, the secret to fab abs, according to MSN’s experts, is that there is no secret, other than sensible diet and regular exercise. Those expensive gadgets that promise a six-pack without the sweat don’t work. In particular, the electro-belt that supposedly shocks your tummy into shape is a complete waste of money – like Maine’s biz policies, producing pain but no gain.

Bruce Kyle is the assistant editorial page editor for the Bangor Daily News.