It is no secret that families in developed countries are having fewer children. The reason often cited for the increasing prevalence of only-child households is that more women are working and, therefore, have less time for raising a family.

However, a more insidious rationale is beginning to be heard. People in well-off countries, like the United States, are too caught up in their material worlds to be bothered with sharing their toys – and their time – with children.

A New York Times story last week about the declining birth rate in Italy quoted women as saying Italian women didn’t want more than one child, or in some cases any children at all, because they didn’t want to bear the expense. As one woman said, cell phones and televisions aren’t enough. They needed more gadgets and fewer kids, she said. She was bold enough to suggest that this was selfish.

Recently a Wall Street Journal columnists admitted that he didn’t want a second child because it would mean vacations to distant lands would be more difficult. He also worried that he wouldn’t be able to buy expensive toys for two children. He’d rather have one spoiled, self-centered child than two who had to make do with a little less was his reasoning.

Sage readers wrote in to suggest that perhaps more important than expensive toys and trips to exotic locales, children would benefit from having a sibling or two. Lessons, such as sharing toys and time with parents, are much more valuable than what can be purchased. Plus, a sibling to share life with (and perhaps more than a few knock-down, drag-out battles as well) may be the greatest gift of all.

The low birth rates in Europe and America have implications for the job market and pension systems. But, if the trend is truly motivated by selfishness, the real damage may be even more difficult to repair. As much as there are complaints about the current crop of adults and teens being motivated by the desire to acquire the newest sport utility vehicle or electronic gadget, the next generation could be even worse. Today’s toddlers, used to having it all, may become tomorrow’s egocentric adults. Not only would they want it all, they would expect that it is their birth right.