Spring training a radiant light at end of dark winter tunnel

And now it’s down to five weeks.

The woodpile is shrinking and the oil bill is growing. The house is getting smaller … and uglier. The same icicles are on the gutters that were on them three weeks ago.

Whatever happened to the January thaw?

There is only one thing to do: Make the reservations for Red Sox spring training in Florida. Isn’t that a great phrase? Makes you warmer already.

When we started going to Fort Myers, it was 1993, the first year the Red Sox moved from Winter Haven. A lot of bitter fans boycotted the move, especially the ones who bought time-shares in Winter Haven, thinking the Sox would be there forever.

This was great for us. We discovered the Royal Palm Motel, which was located within a short walk from the ballpark. After a few years, we knew virtually every demented Red Sox fan who stayed at the Palm. With the exception of a few crack houses, the rates were the lowest in the city. It cost us something like $20 a day, each, to stay there.

Breakfast was at the Farmer’s Market, where they smoke their own ham. Lunch was at the ballpark and dinner was wherever they offered the best happy hour. A very cheap vacation.

Tickets to the games were $8 and you picked out the seat you wanted. For most games, the park was half full. You could call a few weeks before you left and get a bunch of tickets.

Naturally it has all gone to hell. A lot of old goats like me have retired and “discovered” the joys of spring training.

This year, the Red Sox limited ticket sales to “season tickets” until Jan. 18. Season tickets for spring training?

Then they announced that tickets were $18, which is a lot when you consider that the games are really glorified practice sessions. Both the phone and Internet connections were jammed all day long Jan. 18 and we were lucky to get any tickets at all.

The Palm has recognized the madness of New England fans and raised the rates to $90 a day. The posh place next door is only another $20, but it is sold out already. The hotel on the river, which we moved to last year also was sold out. “Should have called in September,” the clerk said.

September? It was still warm in September.

This year, we will struggle along with rooms at a golf course a short drive from the ballpark, at the same price charged by the Palm. We might even have to shoot a few holes on the days when there is no game. It could be a tough two weeks.

On Tuesday, the temperature in Fort Myers was 70 degrees. It was 10 degrees in Camden.

Five weeks from today, I will pack the 15 mpg behemoth and drive 1,200 miles due south. It will take a week to get there with stops in Washington, D.C., Charleston, S.C., and Tampa. It will take a week to get home with stops in all the same places, with a possible side trip to Gettysburg.

When I get home, it will be spring.

Five weeks.

Send complaints and compliments to Emmet Meara at emmetmeara@msn.com.