OK. No matter what you’ve been told, it has been cold at the Bangor Auditorium.

I want a new one.

I know there is a love affair with the old barn. I know the stories.

I know where the elephants walked and where the 16th incarnation of Lynyrd Skynyrd played.

I’ve seen the spot where Mike Thurston hit the shot, and I’ve sat on press row when the catsup and mustard packs came flying when exception was taken to a referee’s call. (I know they rarely make mistakes, even if your team was down 26 points at the time and the refs were costing you the game.)

Unfortunately I wasn’t there the night Bangor’s Joe Campbell hit one of the most famous shots in that school’s history.

I know Pat Summit and the Lady Vols came to town and played at the Auditorium.

I know that the Harlem Globetrotters and wannabe versions of the Globetrotters have thrown their buckets of confetti on courtside fans.

I’ve been told about the Windjammers and the Lumberjacks.

I know Billy Ray Bates played there.

I know many people my age skated there as kids.

I know Disney On Ice skated through.

But I want a new auditorium.

Memory Lane can be set up at the new auditorium. The old clocks, the photos and a chunk of the old floor.

Maybe we could have Thurston stand on the spot where he let the ball go and we could outline his feet and save that chunk of the floor for posterity’s sake.

Maybe we could get some of the old Roller Derby participants and wrestlers who performed there to stop by for the grand opening of the new place.

A new place might bring in some new acts. Instead of acts such as rock groups whose only tie to the original lineup is a guy who carried the lead guitarist’s picks, perhaps some top acts might stop for a visit at our shiny new building.

Maybe Ozzie Osbourne would come by and bite off a bat’s head for us.

Maybe I’m just dreaming. Maybe it will never happen. Maybe we’ll keep traveling to Augusta to the Civic Center every year for the state wrestling championships because its been determined that the Bangor Auditorium is not adequate.

Maybe we’ll keep traveling to Portland and Boston to see top- line acts.

Maybe there’s too much of a love affair with the nostalgia of the Auditorium to do anything about it.

Most assuredly it’s a money thing. Who is going to pay for it? For all the whistles and bells?

Is the racino guy the answer? How about taxes, bonds?

The state’s out of the question.

How about we contact former President Jimmy Carter? Maybe he’ll bring that group he works with to build homes and come up to Maine to build us a new place.

I just know we need one. I felt it in my bones last Friday and Saturday at the tournament.

I felt it in my feet. I felt it was cold. It was put-on-your-coat cold.

No matter what anyone else says. It was cold.

I want a new auditorium.

I just don’t know how to pay for it.

Don Perryman can be reached at 990-8045, 1-800-310-8600 or dperryman@bangordailynews.net.