Children are resilient

It was really depressing watching Bryant Gumbel’s “Real Sports” the other night, viewing the piece on parents suing high school coaches and referees claiming lost opportunities for their sons’ and daughters’ future prospects of fame. One parent was suing a high school baseball coach for lack of playing time for his son, while another was suing a football referee for a call which allowed a field goal by the opposing team in the last four seconds of an important playoff game which would have led to an opportunity to play in a state championship.

As parents sitting in the stands, we experience many emotions. We all “bleed” for our kids as they sit on the bench, miss an important shot, strike out, fall off the beam, stumble over a hurdle, miss an easy grounder, double fault, or miss a big tackle. At other times in the stands, we parents have an incredible “rush” at our children’s success – no matter how small. But, aren’t the ups and downs a rite of passage for both parent and child? And, isn’t it really a growth and relationship opportunity for all of us? We all play in many “games” throughout our lives and I would hate to think that the most important game in one of my children’s lives was on the high school field or court.

A lot of parents forget how resilient kids can be, as they pull together to support a failure of one of their teammates. Many athletes take it in stride and learn from the experience. The lingering sense of failure usually rests in the parent, not the child. Some bring that emotion to a ridiculous degree, such as the people suing coaches; while others use it as an opportunity to support and commend the child’s efforts, encouraging improvement.

Throughout his college career, one of my sons played on a highly regarded Division III soccer team. For many games, my wife and I would make the trek to the Greater Boston area to see the team in action. My son saw very little playing time, and we did not even see him play after our four-hour journey. Finally, in his senior year, I asked him why he devoted so much time and effort over his college career to this team. Without missing a beat, he shot back at me, “Dad, I love this game!”

I would like to think we had something to do with that answer.

Mike McInnis

Hampden

The two Boston teams

The two Boston teams both need one thing each to ever be champions. The Boston Celtics need that big man in the middle and until they get that big center, they will never win anything.

Now the Red Sox need a closer like the one they gave Texas. Right now, they don’t have a bullpen. They just can’t keep picking up these has-beens or used-to-bes. It’s just not going to work, and please get rid of John Burkett, he’s a used-to-be and will never be again.

Don Smart

Old Town