A new vehicle – instead of a house

No way am I paying more for a vehicle than for our first house. Call it a matter of principle, but a roof over my head, Sheetrocked walls and formerly fashionable shag carpeting surely have more combined value than do V6 engines, trailer tows and seating – heated – for more people than on the prop-plane from Bangor to Boston.

The first house cost under $25,000; of course, that was 30-odd years ago – some of them pretty odd when I look back on them. A typical three-bedroom, 11/2-bath ranch with a picture window that viewed the pedestrian panorama of similar homes in the subdivision, our house was the epitome of those built in the flat ’50s: flat lot, flat roof, flat personality. But it was worth a 30-year mortgage at a higher interest rate than nowadays.

Certainly, it was worth more than a minivan or a sport utility vehicle or a luxury sedan, even if they do come complete with remote keyless entry, 6-disc CD changers and lumbar-supported seat positions that have a computerized memory system. Not to mention sunroofs or moon roofs, the name changing with the time of day.

Back in those days, I bought a compact station wagon brand new for $3,600. I drove it 142,000 miles till the underneath frame rusted clean through, the back bumper disintegrated in a carwash, and Midas gave up on guaranteeing the muffler. Still, I sold it for $800 before launching my search for another vehicle – an exercise I indulge in every 9 or 10 years.

Today’s vehicles are astonishing. Some look longer than a Greyhound bus with tinted windows so no one can see the kids, pets and rigging packed inside. There are global satellite systems installed so you know where you’re going, tracking systems so others who need to know can locate you, auxiliary power sources for cell phones, computers and digital video-disc machines.

There are split-fold rear seats, tilt steering wheels, anti-lock brakes, all-wheel drive, step bars, climate control, air bags, cruise control, fog lights, rear defrost, aluminum wheels, sunscreen glass, splash guards, dual-zone air conditioning, bucket seats (leather), luggage rack crossbars, power adjustable pedals, roof racks, running boards and Bose radios.

With your remote control, you can stand inside your house and turn on your car engine so that the climate controls can blast heat into the spacious vehicle before you make your keyless entry and your warm seat automatically returns to the desired position you programmed.

That’s all well and good, but I have a memory system too, and I’m loath to pay more for a car than for our first house – or actually, more than double the amount. Advertised the other day was a 2004 Lexus LS430 for $58,995…used.

A new Mercedes-Benz or Cadillac costs more than twice Maine’s average per capita income.

That’s more than some houses, even today.