Conservative case for same-gender marriage

It is well known that many liberals support equal marriage rights for lesbians and gays. But is there a conservative case for same-gender marriage? Yes. Conservatives support the domesticating effects of marriage, such as fidelity, monogamy, stability and responsibility. If these things are good for heterosexuals, they are good for homosexuals as well. Is it better for gay people to live single, isolated lives, and in some cases promiscuous lives, or is it better to provide social incentives for responsible and faithful behavior?

But if marriage doesn’t guarantee that heterosexuals will be monogamous, is there any guarantee that it will lead to monogamy among gays and lesbians? No, of course not. There are no guarantees, but there are incentives and disincentives. What would happen if there was a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy toward heterosexual marriage? You can bet that infidelity and divorce would skyrocket. If conservatives favor fidelity, stability and monogamy, then logically they should support these values for all families, not just heterosexual families.

Of course, there’s also a liberal argument for same-gender marriage. Our nation affirms that all people are created equal, and should have the same unalienable rights. The right to marry is one of the most fundamental rights in our nation. Legally, the right to marry is usually deemed prior even to the right to vote. Denying gays and lesbians the right to marry is a prima-facie case of the government discriminating against a group of citizens on the basis of a characteristic that they cannot change.

Same-gender couples are denied taxation benefits and automatic inheritance rights. If one partner is incapacitated, the other is not automatically guardian or conservator. And a lesbian couple, friends of mine who are retired, fear that if one of them dies the other will lose the house, because she will not be able to receive her partner’s Social Security benefits. As a heterosexual, I have these rights and they don’t.

Some say marriage is only for procreation. Well, my wife and I have no children, yet no one challenges our right to be married. And my brother’s wife is black. Until 1967 interracial marriages were illegal in large sections of our nation. Many churches taught that interracial marriages were an abomination condemned by God and the Bible. Well, the Bible didn’t change, but our understanding of the Bible changed.

Today, most Christian conservatives believe that the Bible condemns homosexuality. But when I read the story of Sodom in Genesis 19, I see that it is not about homosexuality at all. It is about an attempted gang rape. Rape is always wrong, whether it is heterosexual or homosexual.

Leviticus seems to clearly condemn same-gender sex, calling it an abomination. But the two or three sentences that mention this are part of a much larger “holiness code” that also condemns other abominations such as eating shellfish or pork, cutting your beard, cutting your hair, cross-breeding animals and wearing clothes made of mixed fabric. This holiness code was designed in ancient times to set Israel apart from her neighbors, but most Christians have rejected this code since the time of the Apostle Paul, who taught that the law of love replaces all these rules. Fundamentalists are being inconsistent when they reject this entire code except its condemnation of homosexuality.

In the New Testament, Paul condemns temple prostitution and the sexual exploitation of underage boys. But in the original Koine Greek he does not specifically condemn homosexuality.

In fact, no properly translated Bible contains the word “homosexual.”

Homosexuality is one of the smallest issues in the Bible. It’s not mentioned in the Ten Commandments. The prophets don’t mention it. Jesus never preached against it. But in the Gospels Jesus did mention love 47 times and forgiveness 22 times. Jesus did not criticize homosexuals, but he did criticize those self-righteous religious leaders who judged and condemned others.

Christian values teach us to advocate for justice and refrain from judging, so that we will not be judged.

Liberal values ask us to treat all citizens equally. Conservative values call on us to promote social stability by offering the same incentives for faithfulness and fidelity to all families.

The Rev. Mark Worth is minister of the Unitarian Universalist Church of Ellsworth and the Castine Unitarian Church.