BANGOR – The November elections brought many current issues into focus for concerned citizens. One of the social issues that the candidates differed on was how a woman should handle an unplanned pregnancy. This is a complicated topic and one that conjures questions unique for each woman, according to officials of a local agency. It is precisely for that reason that the issue of choice comes into play.

My Choice, a program of the Maine Adoption Placement Service, supports women who are facing the issue of unplanned pregnancy.

“At MAPS we believe in a woman’s right to choose but feel that she deserves access to education on all of her options before making this important decision for herself and her child,” said Kristen Hirsch, MAPS regional director.

When a woman is dealing with an unplanned pregnancy, only three options are available – parenting, termination of the pregnancy or adoption. The pro-choice debate strikes a deep chord with most people. It is human nature to want to simplify difficult decisions based on some definition of what is right or wrong. In the midst of all the debating, the third choice of adoption is often overlooked.

Each year, November is recognized as National Adoption Awareness Month. It began as an effort to draw attention to the need for permanent families for children in the foster care system. It has since evolved into a month dedicated to raising awareness and sensitivity around adoption issues that affect all members of the adoption triad – adoptees, adoptive families and birthparents. In the past, birthparents were left out of the equation. Adoption was seen as something that should remain a secret, which in turn, assigned shame to those involved in adoption.

“In our work with birth mothers, we see their intense personal struggle around what is best for their babies and themselves. We see the maturity and insight that is evoked in making such a decision. When a woman facing an unplanned pregnancy is brave enough to speak up and say she is not ready to be a parent, we think it is important to listen,” Hirsch said.

The support services of the My Choice program are designed to help a woman sort out the emotions behind the pregnancy and to identify what is needed to successfully parent a child. For those who feel ready to parent, My Choice is able to collaborate with other area resources to put the proper supports in place, including prenatal care, housing, parenting education, child care and job training.

“The program serves as a safety net to ensure that new mothers start off on the right foot, or that struggling moms don’t fall through the cracks,” said Cindy McLellan, parenting program coordinator.

For those who are questioning whether they are ready to parent, options counseling is available.

“The reality is that all three options carry a sense of grief and loss. It is very difficult to manage on your own,” Hirsch said. Many women wait until late in their pregnancy to ask for help because they are in denial of the situation or just don’t know where to turn to for help. Most women who inquire about adoption already have a sense of what they want to do, but are unsure of the process.

“It is our job to assure them that they are in control of their decision. We are only here to help them put their plan in place,” said Hirsch. Birth mothers, she said, may participate in the selection of the adoptive family and are the ones who determine how “open” or “closed” they want the adoption plan to be.

MAPS encourages people to move away from the old adoption language such as “giving a child up for adoption” and instead use adoption-sensitive language such as “making an adoption plan” because it more accurately reflects the careful thought that goes into the decision.

“People really have no idea the level of maturity and inner strength is takes to put the best interest of the child first.” Hirsch said.

To obtain more information about the My Choice program, or to consider adding to your family through adoption, call 941-9500, or visit www.mapsadopt.org.

Melissa Huston is development director of MAPS/My Choice.