In-flight phone ban fans speak

Just when you think the world couldn’t get any wackier, along comes a collective voice of reason to help restore your faith in humanity, at least temporarily.

Such was the case recently after federal regulators came up with the ludicrous notion to begin considering rules that would eventually lift the ban on cell phone conversations during commercial flights.

Cell phone use, as even the most infrequent fliers probably know, is now prohibited once the airplane’s cabin doors are closed and the flight attendant announces that all personal electronic devices must be turned off in preparation for takeoff.

While some airlines allow people to resume cell phone conversations once an airplane has touched down and is taxiing to the gate, the time spent in the sky has always been reserved for making small talk with seatmates, reading, thinking or napping in the relatively peaceful atmosphere that air travel still affords the public.

Then last month, the Federal Communications Commission got together and authorized a review of the ban on the use of personal electronic devices, a move that’s regarded as the first step toward finally letting fliers yak away on their cell phones to earthbound friends and business clients from 30,000 feet.

According to news reports, a couple of big wireless companies are busily developing the software that could soon provide unfettered Internet access during flight while also allowing the use of cell phones without the fear that they’ll disrupt the airplane’s navigational and communication systems.

When I trashed this hideous development in a column last month, a few of you called or wrote me to say you also dreaded the idea of being held hostage in a cramped cabin for hours at a time with dozens of loud, one-sided phone conversationalists and the constant chirping of their digitized ringers.

It could add a whole new dimension to the fear of flying, you said. It could make the wails of a fussy baby sound like a lullaby by comparison, and quite possibly set off an epidemic of air rage that would quickly make the once-friendly skies a whole lot less friendly.

Well, I’m pleased to report that there are plenty of other Americans out there who feel exactly the same way about unleashing a torrent of banal air-to-ground travelogues, unwelcome intimate ramblings, angry rants and nonstop business blabber. As soon as the news broke that federal regulators were rethinking the ban, the FCC got swamped with 1,200 e-mails in protest.

“Many airline passengers don’t relish the idea of sitting next to someone yelling into their cell phones for an entire six-hour flight,” one compassionate air-industry expert said, adding, “I know I don’t.”

A USA Today/CNN/Gallup poll released last week found that almost seven of 10 frequent or occasional fliers want the feds to maintain the blessed ban. Women and fliers 50 or older were the most strongly inclined to keep airliner cabins free from the cacophony of cell phone chatter, ring tones and passengers trying to out-talk their seatmates.

“Our job is to see if this is possible and then to let consumers work out the etiquette,” one FCC member said breezily.

If that’s the case, then don’t forget the Dramamine because we’re all about to experience some nasty turbulence ahead.