Weak script, cast hamper Wes Craven’s film ‘Cursed’

In theaters

CURSED, Directed by Wes Craven, written by Kevin Williamson, 86 minutes, rated PG-13.

The hammy new horror movie “Cursed” stars Christina Ricci as Ellie Hudson, a television producer for “The Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn” who finds herself sandbagged with a horror show of a different sort.

After surviving a nasty car wreck on Mulholland Drive, Ellie and her unpopular brother, Jimmy (Jesse Eisenberg), are doomed to the dark side when each is attacked by a werewolf.

Infected with its blood, they find themselves going through what can best be described as an unfortunate second bout of puberty: Hair appears where it never appeared before, unappealing mood swings cloud their worlds, interest in the occult emerges, everyone seems against them.

Who took a bite out of them? Take your pick – Hollywood is filled with wolves. Still, in this case, it could be any number of people.

There’s Ellie’s smoldering love interest, Jake (Joshua Jackson), who is opening a hip new discotheque filled with wax dummies. There’s cruel Joanie, a soulless publicist played with undermining mince by Judy Greer. And there’s even Scott Baio, the former television star of “Happy Days” and “Joanie Loves Chachi,” who shakes things up by playing himself. Here, he’s a ho-hum has been.

In the movie, Baio is represented by Joanie – of course he is, naturally he is. But that bit of comedy is so awkwardly played, as are most of the laughs in “Cursed,” that it likely will raise more eyebrows in print than it does onscreen.

As directed by that old horror mainstay Wes Craven from a script by his “Scream” series collaborator, Kevin Williamson, “Cursed” contrives a story in which Ellie and Jimmy can break free from their curse only if they sever the head of the werewolf that bit them.

And so, in spite of the unexpected benefits that come from being a werewolf – Ellie gains sex appeal, Jimmy gains confidence, nobody messes with them – they push forward in an effort to do just that.

All of this could have been loose, kitschy fun, but “Cursed” is too self-conscious to get off the ground. Working against it is a weak script, an odd, ugly rash of homophobia that fractures the first third, and lazy special effects sequences that add nothing to the film but the occasional snort and giggle.

It’s up to the cast to get the job done, but with the exception of Ricci and Eisenberg, who are good here, that’s like applying modest pressure to a hemorrhaging wound.

Grade C-

On video and DVD

THE GRUDGE, Directed by Takashi Shimizu, written by Shimizu and Stephen Susco, 96 minutes, rated PG-13.

Speaking of curses, “The Grudge” begins with some heady news: “When someone dies in the grip of a powerful rage, a curse is left behind. Those who encounter it die, and a new curse is born.”

Let’s hope they’re wrong. Otherwise, should someone kick the can after seeing this beauty, curses will descend upon video stores everywhere.

Shot in the washed-out blues of a corpse, “The Grudge” stars Sarah Michelle Gellar as Karen, an American nurse living in Tokyo with her boyfriend, Doug (Jason Behr), who is studying architecture.

When Karen volunteers to tend to a mentally unstable American woman at a nearby house, she finds it haunted by a little boy who shrieks like a cat and his mother, who makes such a corrosive, gargling noise whenever she appears, some might feel compelled to throw little purple pills at the screen to help heal the damage. Both died brutally in ways that won’t be revealed here.

Naturally, since Karen has entered the house, she is in danger of also dying because of the curse that now infects her. Bill Pullman and Clea DuVall appear in sketchy flashbacks, but how director Shimizu introduces them to the story is muddled, killing the fun.

This empty, confusing movie – a stunt that capitalizes on the success of 2002’s “The Ring” – is a remake of the 2003 low-budget Japanese horror film “Ju-On: The Grudge,” itself a remake, of sorts, of 2000’s “Ju-On: The Curse” and “Ju-On: The Curse 2.”

All were such hits in Japan, producer and fan Sam Raimi commissioned the series’ director, Takashi Shimizu, to direct an American version of “The Grudge.” Too bad so much is lost in translation. As written by Shimizu and Stephen Susco, “The Grudge” is sludge, fragmenting time so completely, it generates a train wreck of confusion onscreen.

Grade: D-

Christopher Smith is the Bangor Daily News film critic. His reviews appear Mondays and Fridays in Style, and are archived at RottenTomatoes.

com. He may be reached at bdnfilm1@aol.com