We’re like Thelma and Louise, my sister and I. Except it’s Jessica and Kristen. And we hit the road a few weeks ago in search of bargains, not because either of us is on the lam. Oh, and for some strange reason, we didn’t meet up with Brad Pitt, either.

Damn.

On second thought, I guess the only thing we have in common with T&L is that we did go on a road trip. To Freeport. But let me tell you: it was glamorous as all get out.

See, it’s impossible to avoid the glamour in Freeport. A Coach bag on clearance still has all that Coachy cachet. Even when heaped haphazardly in a dimly lit basement, Brooks Brothers shirts are still Brooks Brothers shirts. Part of Freeport’s allure is the fact that you can’t get half of these labels anywhere else in Maine. The ridiculously low prices don’t hurt, either.

We started in familiar territory – the Gap Outlet, which wasn’t nearly as exciting as either of us had hoped. Much of it was stuff we passed on the first time around, and the prices didn’t cause us to reconsider. But the neighboring Banana Republic Factory Store was fabulous. I grabbed a wrap shirt for $19.99. Junior picked up capris.

We were happy, and we trotted off to L.L. Bean, not because we needed hiking boots, but because a trip to Freeport isn’t complete without a stop at the flagship. I was pleasantly surprised to see the new “colorburst” boat and tote bags – who could resist the pint size model in black and hot pink? Not I, especially at $12. The home section was fabulous, as was the pet area (my doggies would’ve been in heaven).

In a nod to the ’80s, Junior sang, “You can Dansk if you want to” as we crossed the road toward the Dansk-Lenox outlet. If you need cookware, go – Dansk is going out of business, and they’re practically giving stuff away.

Not so at J.Crew. I wanted everything in there, but I couldn’t bring myself to buy any of it. If I wanted to spend $60 on a skirt, I would’ve gone to the mall. But I digress. Sometimes, the best deals can be found in unexpected places, like the Brooks Brothers basement, where I picked up two clearance shirts for ShopGuy for a whopping $25 total. Sweet.

The North Face outlet was also a fabulous find. Ski jackets cost well under $100, but since I already have a North Face parka, I picked up a pair of sporty capris for $24.95 instead.

Next, we wandered into relatively uncharted territory – the stretch of Route 1 north of L.L. Bean. In all the years I’ve shopped in Freeport, I’ve never made it over there. I’ve been south (I always stop at Grace Robinson for yarns Cuddledown for bed linens and down comforters on the way to Yarmouth), but never north.

I’ve been missing out. We wandered into the touristy Mangy Moose, where we found all sorts of cool gifts, games and camp-style furnishings. Then we ducked into Edgecomb Potters Gallery – perfect for wedding gifts. Then it was off to Pet Pantry, whose main allure is the bakery case full of doggie desserts such as cannolis, cookies and tarts for your canine companion. Very cool. We checked out the jewelry at Earrings & Co., many of it by New England artisans, then we headed back to designer territory.

First stop, Polo Ralph Lauren Factory Store, where you can find great deals on T-shirts, sheets and (big surprise) polos. Next, we hoofed it upstairs to Nine West, but left empty-footed. At Burberry, we felt as out of place, and broke, as possible. Perhaps all the salespeople ignored us because we had to – gasp! – look at the price tags. Oh, well. I already have a Burberry scarf anyway, and I’m about plaided out.

We window-shopped at ColeHaan and Dooney & Bourke, and I drooled all over the floor at the Coach Factory Store before they kicked me out (kidding!). Then I popped into Little Sweet Peas to look for a baby shower gift – this boutique has wonderful children’s gear and the most amazing little girl dresses you’d ever see. Later, we stopped at Abacus, which has funky, stylish handcrafts and gorgeous jewelry.

But I found the real score of the day in an unlikely location. As we headed back to the car, a sign for Puzzles&Games Etc. caught my eye. I’m a board game fanatic, and I’m addicted to canasta, but I’ve also been searching for a game called Pass the Pigs for months. In it, you roll little plastic pigs like dice and score according to how they land (let’s just say if they end up snouts down, you’re golden). Trust me on this one, it’s fantastic. And they had it, for $10.95!

It was the perfect way to wrap up our shopping expedition. I was happy. My sister was happy. And fortunately, the day didn’t end with the two of us plunging off a cliff in my Sentra.

ShopGirl would love to hear from you! Send questions, comments or suggestions by e-mail to: kandresen@bangordailynews.net, by U.S. mail to: Kristen Andresen, P.O. Box 1329, Bangor, ME 04402-1329, or by fax to: 941-9476. Tune in to ShopGirl at 5 p.m. Fridays on WLBZ-2.

If you go….

Banana Republic, 39 Main St., 865-1452

Brooks Brothers Factory Store, 24 Bow St., 865-1835

Burberry, 42 Main St., (800) 284-8480

Coach Factory Store, 48 West St., 865-1772

ColeHaan Company Store, 66 Main St., 865-6321

Cuddledown, 475 U.S. Route 1 South, 865-1713

Dansk Factory Outlet, 100 Main St., 865-6125

Earrings & Co., 2A Mechanic St., 865-3097

Edgecomb Potters Galleries, 8 School St., 865-1705

Gap Outlet, 35 Main St., 865-4452

Grace Robinson & Co., 208 U.S Route 1 South, 865-6110

J. Crew Factory Store, 10 Bow Street., 865-3180

Little Sweet Peas, 22 Main St., 865-3933

L.L.Bean, 95 Main St., (800) 559-0747, ext. 37222

Mangy Moose, 112 Main St., 865-6414

Nine West Outlet, 76 Main St., 865-2170

The North Face, 5 Bow St., 865-0300

Pet Pantry, 140 Main St., 865-6484

Polo Ralph Lauren Factory Store, 76 Main St., 865-4176

Puzzles&Games Etc., 58 Main St., 865-4185