In theaters

UNDISCOVERED, directed by Meiert Avis, written by John Galt, 97 minutes, rated PG-13.

The title of this airy, riffy drama from first-time feature director Meiert Avis gets to the film’s nonperformance at the box office. Avis pushes “Undiscovered” into the high-strung subcategory of model-musician love – always dangerous, treacherous territory – where characters of no substance demand to be taken seriously or else.

“Or else what,” you ask? “Or else they’ll have a bad hair day” seems to be the answer.

Problem is, you can’t take any of this seriously – the film exists in the ether, where the air is thin and the actors can’t breathe. Apparently, neither could screenwriter John Galt, whose script is every bit as literate as the content you’d find in, say, a back issue of “Blender” or “Maxim,” with just as much eye candy to bolster the thin material.

Too bad this candy is sour.

The movie stars Pell James as Brier, a delicate model-cum-actress who meets-cute on a New York subway with smoky singer-songwriter Luke Falcon (Steven Strait). It’s a brief connection that involves the romantic, spontaneous tossing of a glove – swoon – with their meeting hitting Luke hard in the heart. If he had the chance, he could drink a whole lot of Brier.

Too bad for Luke that he’s off to Los Angeles to find himself and his music. Good news for Luke, then, that Brier has something of a religious calling. She decides she’d rather like to act, which her manager – Carrie Fisher, how tragic – rightfully is apprehensive about encouraging. Still, it’s off to L.A. for Brier – and you’ll never guess what happens next. She eventually meets up with Luke, with their tumultuous love affair hanging in the balance more often than not.

Tossed into this mix are skateboarding dogs, plenty of music video montages, and Ashlee Simpson as Ashlee Simpson – sorry, as Clea – who appears to be saying her lines just fine without any technical assistance. Good for her.

Here, she’s Brier’s friend, an aspiring actress who likes to sing her heart out, so much so that some might long for a hook to tear her away from the mike. To be fair to Simpson, she’s not as bad as the rest of the cast, but that’s faint praise considering the talent involved. Still, all isn’t lost for this young star of music and reality television. Unlike her older sister, Jessica, she won’t ever be the Simpson who spent the summer of 2005 squeezed into a padded pair of Daisy Dukes.

Grade: D-

VALIANT, directed by Gary Chapman, written by Jordan Katz, George Webster and George Melrod, 76 minutes, rated G.

A computer-animated movie from Disney about the contributions of carrier pigeons in World War II: Good topic, fair animation, but the story quacks like a duck.

As directed by Gary Chapman from a script by Jordan Katz, George Webster and George Meldrod, “Valiant” follows Valiant (voice of Ewan McGregor), a perky little Brit bird with a can-do attitude and a limited wingspan who dreams big of fighting the big fight with an elite squadron of British carrier pigeons.

His mother is having none of it – she’d rather cough up something for Valiant to eat – but Valiant has other ideas and soon is part of an underwhelming team of misfits going off to war. Joining him are Bugsy (Ricky Gervais), who has, shall we say, hygiene issues; brainiac Lofty (Pip Torrens); Toughwood and Tailfeather (Brian Lonsdale, Dan Roberts) and Gutsy (Hugh Laurie), a bird who seems to be on a suicide mission.

Together, it’s their job to deliver a crucial message for the war effort, which could either make or break Normandy. The work isn’t easy. In this curious movie of good versus evil, where the Nazis are depicted as falcons and Tim Curry’s menacing Von Talon likely will put a steel tremble in younger kids, the mix between comedy and terror is jarring, with none of it gelling at the end.

Should Polly want a mediocre movie, feed her this.

Grade: C-

On video and DVD

FEVER PITCH, directed by Peter Farrelly and Bobby Farrelly, written by Lowell Ganz and Babaloo Mandel, 98 minutes, PG-13.

From the Farrelly brothers, makers of “There’s Something About Mary,” “Dumb & Dumber,” “Osmosis Jones” and “Stuck on You,” comes “Fever Pitch” – but don’t let that encourage you if you’re a fan, or discourage you if you aren’t.

The film finds the Farrellys leaving their trademark gas-and-gross-out gags in favor of something more traditional: romance. The film is about love – love for the game of baseball, specifically the Red Sox, and the love that grows between Drew Barrymore’s Lindsay Meeks, a corporate executive on the climb, and Jimmy Fallon’s Ben Wrightman, a high school teacher and Red Sox fanatic.

Let’s define fanatic. For Ben, it means he has attended every single Red Sox home game for the past 20-plus years, he sleeps on Red Sox sheets, drinks from Red Sox mugs, and uses Yankee toilet paper just so he can rub in the point of how he feels about that team.

Obviously, there is a downside to such obsession, and for Ben, it’s this: By spending so much time rooting for the Sox, he has yet to connect long-term with anyone save for a few male friends, also Sox fanatics. Likeable as he is, the man is emotionally stunted, his priorities screwed up. As one character succinctly puts it, “the Sox have never loved you back, Ben.”

As written by Lowell Ganz and Babaloo Mandel, “Fever Pitch” rides the rails of formula but it’s consistently enjoyable. Throughout, the writing is solid, often clever; the chemistry between Barrymore and Fallon is undeniable; you come to care for the characters; and the robust, wholly unbelievable ending is earned.

Grade: A-

Visit www.weekinrewind.com, the new archive of Bangor Daily News film critic Christopher Smith’s reviews, which appear Mondays in Discovering, Fridays in Happening, and weekends in Television. He may be reached at christopher@weekinrewind.com.