Civility note makes man instant hero

Perhaps you’ve heard about the Chicago cafe owner who became an international folk hero for hanging up a little paper sign asking that children behave while in his restaurant.

If not, the inspiring tale goes something like this:

Dan McCauley, who owns a North Side eatery called A Taste of Heaven, got fed up one day with children sprawling on the floor in front of his counter, bouncing off his pastry display case, playing around the front door and generally running amok through the cafe while their oblivious parents just sat there eating and doing nothing to control their unruly offspring. So McCauley wrote a sign that read “Children of all ages have to behave and use their indoor voices when coming to A Taste of Heaven.” Then he decorated the sign with a few kiddie handprints and hung it on the door, at a child’s eye level, with suction cups.

It was a simple and fair request, intended more for the clueless, overly permissive parents than for the rambunctious children they failed to monitor. But some of the neighborhood parents didn’t view it as a kindly reminder at all. They interpreted it to mean that McCauley regarded their precious kiddies as unwelcomed hell-raisers and that they were irresponsible parents for not controlling them properly. They bristled and fumed at such an offensive suggestion and staged an informal boycott of the cafe.

In a November New York Times article about the flap, which generated broad debate, one of the miffed boycotters was quoted as saying, in part, “kids scream and there is nothing you can do about it. What are we supposed to do, not enjoy ourselves at a cafe?”

If that inane comment just caused you to utter an emphatic “Huh?” – as it did me, when I first read it – be assured that we’re in some pretty sizable company.

After the Times ran its story about the frustrated cafe owner’s plea for manners and the backlash it generated, people everywhere began calling to congratulate the guy for his humble stand on parental responsibility and misbehaving children in public places. Aside from the 600 letters and more than 2,000 calls he got from strangers around the country and as far away as China and Australia, McCauley was besieged by local and national media outlets who all wanted to interview him on his heroic call for civility at a time when such a commodity would appear to be in alarmingly short supply.

The online pundits and bloggers weighed in, too, of course. They shared stories about hiring baby sitters for those occasional relaxing, childless nights out, only to find themselves in a restaurant, movie theater or other public venue next to kids behaving badly and lazy parents who were unwilling to rein them in for fear of inhibiting their little darlings’ sense of self-esteem and creative expression.

In an AP story about the sign heard ’round the world, one Tufts University child psychologist said that our society’s emphasis on unrestricted liberty for everyone in every situation can become “a kind of selfish entitlement that undermines our ability to function as a civil community.”

Meanwhile, McCauley, the unlikely hero and champion of the indoor voice, can only shake his head at all the attention his little sign has caused. Speaking to the Chicago Tribune’s Eric Zorn, as Geraldo Rivera waited in line for an interview, the perplexed cafe owner said, “I mean, all this over a piece of paper held up by suction cups.”

And supported by civil-minded people everywhere.