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In theaters
“Nanny McPhee”
Directed by Kirk Jones, written by Emma Thompson, 91 minutes, rated PG.
Upon first glance, you’d swear her parents had commingled with rats.
There is, after all, the rather distressing issue of her overlapping front snaggletooth, which pinches her chin and suggests that somebody here took deep strokes in the shallow end of the gene pool. And then there’s her nose, which is a shock of twisted audacity, and her face, which has blossomed with warts.
Her ruddy complexion doesn’t exactly help her homely plight, nor does the fact that her strawlike hair is in desperate need of a hot oil treatment and that her gigantic bottom, draped in yards of black fabric, is large enough on which to show a double feature – simultaneously and in widescreen.
The person in question is Nanny McPhee, the fearsome governess with the magical walking stick who is the title character of the new Kirk Jones movie.
As written by Emma Thompson from the “Nurse Matilda” books by Christianna Brand, “McPhee” stars Thompson in the lead and she’s the best part of the movie, absolutely in her element even though the movie itself isn’t nearly as fetching or as funny as its trailer and television ads promise.
Set in the late 19th century, the film stars Colin Firth as mortician Cedric Brown, who is busy mourning the death of his wife while trying his best to provide care for his seven unruly children. In no time, his brats have gone through 17 nannies before they come upon the formidable McPhee.
It’s she who has the moxie to contain them. It’s also she who appears, as if by some unknown calling, to teach them life lessons. When each lesson is learned, it gives McPhee herself something of a dramatic makeover. The warts disappear, the weight comes off, the hair, the nose, the teeth soften.
Just why is never explained, so one has to come to the conclusion that the only reason she cleans up so well is so that we can see that Emma Thompson is still attractive. What a relief.
The crux of the movie comes down to this: In order to keep his children, Cedric must protect the monthly check provided by his wealthy Aunt Adelaide (Angela Lansbury), a haughty, die-hard Victorian who demands that he marry within a month or she’ll cut him off completely, even if it means that his children will be divided into foster care.
Celia Imrie is Mrs. Quickly, the buxom blonde with the harsh curls and the saucy red mouth who is a few decades past her prime but more than happy to marry Cedric. Kelly Macdonald is Evangeline, the beautiful scullery maid on which so many hopes are pinned. It’s she, after all, who belongs with Cedric. But will they come together?
It doesn’t exactly take a trick walking stick to figure that out. “Nanny McPhee,” with its stale whiff of “Mary Poppins,” is good-natured and genial, but to a fault. A real sense of danger could have helped the movie, a little drama beyond, say, the food fight that comes at the end. Its appeal likely will be for the youngest in the household. All others might wish that this nanny recalled a bit of Bette Davis’ nanny in 1965’s “The Nanny.” Cross that film with “Mary Poppins,” and you would have had a movie on your hands.
Grade: B-
On video and DVD
“In Her Shoes”
Directed by Curtis Hanson, written by Susannah Grant, 129 minutes, rated PG-13.
Curtis Hanson’s “In Her Shoes” begins with a lingering close-up of high-heeled shoes, which are so lovingly photographed, it smacks of fetish. These shoes – the price of which would surpass some countries’ gross domestic product – are more trouble than they appear, particularly since in them are feet that belong to a person whose careless, promiscuous lifestyle has been filled with its share of self-induced bunions.
That person is Maggie Feller (Cameron Diaz), a loose-living, free-wheeling thief whose skills in attracting the opposite sex prove every bit as formidable as her sister’s skills in earning a living. Said sister is Rose (Toni Collette), a Rubenesque lawyer at a top Philadelphia firm whose low self-esteem is consuming. Unlike her tall, toned sister, on whom clothes, hair and makeup seem so natural, Rose has always been able to turn to shoes for the right fit. They never have let her down, which she can’t say for her family, the likes of which was smashed apart the day her sketchy mother died in a car wreck. It has been unable to mend itself since.
As written by Susannah Grant from Jennifer Weiner’s best-selling novel, “In Her Shoes” isn’t the turgid soap opera it appears to be and it also isn’t the comedy it could have been. In spite of a handful of funny scenes and undercurrents that recall the “Bridget Jones” movies, the film is a drama first, with Curtis confidently guiding the story into new rooms with unexpected entrances.
While the principal story focuses on Rose and Maggie, who become unhappily divided, rounding out the complications is a spite-filled relationship with their cruel stepmother (Candice Azzara) and a weak father (Ken Howard), and the unexpected addition of Ella, a long-lost grandmother played to perfection by Shirley MacLaine.
As with Diaz’s and Collette’s spot-on performances, MacLaine reminds us here how great she can be when Hollywood isn’t serving her a big dish of ham. She is reserved, knowing and cool, gently stitching together a family that was taken from her after her daughter’s death.
Grade: A-
Visit www.weekinrewind.com, the archive of Bangor Daily News film critic Christopher Smith’s reviews, which appear Mondays in Discovering, Fridays in Happening, and Weekends in Television. He may be reached at Christopher@weekinrewind.com.
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