In theaters

AMERICAN DREAMZ, written and directed by Paul Weitz, 107 minutes, rated PG-13.

Paul Weitz’s “American Dreamz” assembles a sumptuous buffet for the viewer, but since Weitz isn’t hungry, he just stares at the spread, dumbly refusing to eat when he really should gorge.

The film attempts to send up “American Idol,” George W. Bush, pop culture and our fascination with fame, and yet somehow – incredibly – it misses on every conceivable level to get the job done.

How do you screw up an opportunity such as this? Even if you love “American Idol,” love Bush, love where the culture is going and adore fame, you would think there is no way you could miss taking them all on, even if you felt you had to play it safe by doing it with affection. Certainly even then, a measure of good-natured hair-pulling wouldn’t be out of line. Perhaps it might even be fun.

“American Dreamz” isn’t even a little fun. It’s dull and generic, with the continuing sense that it was conceived by some dim-witted enfant banal given a Handycam and sent wandering into the back lot, where it encountered a sideshow, the possibilities of which it couldn’t understand.

In its most streamlined form, the film is about an attempt by our down-in-the-dumps president (Dennis Quaid) to lift his disappointing poll numbers by appearing on the nation’s most-watched television talent show, “American Dreamz.” The idea is that by being on a hip show, the hipness will rub off. It doesn’t, though the president’s chief of staff (Willem Dafoe, lamely channeling Cheney) and bland wife (Marcia Gay Harden, lamely channeling Laura) believe it might.

Hugh Grant is Martin Tweed, the show’s critic who is meant to be a riff on Simon Cowell, but forget it – it’s a bad imitation, with Grant mining none of Cowell’s caustic directness or sly sense of humor.

Mandy Moore is Sally Kendoo, a Midwestern climber who considers ditching her boyfriend, William Williams (Chris Klein), when she is chosen to appear on “American Dreamz,” but who has second thoughts when Tweed suggests that William’s war injury might help her chances of winning. Add to this the inclusion of an Arab terrorist bomber named Omer (Sam Golzari), who has a thing for show tunes and a flamboyantly gay cousin (Tony Yalda) at the ready, and what you have is a melting pot of stereotypes moving toward an explosive ending. Omer, you see, plans to blow up the president onstage.

The 25th anniversary of “Cats” sounds more entertaining than this drivel, which does come as a surprise. Weitz is a fine director. His “In Good Company” was one of the better independent films of 2004. His “About a Boy,” co-written and directed with his brother Chris, was smarter than it had any right to be, particularly since one false move with that film could have tipped it into pandering.

So, what happened here? The problem with “American Dreamz” is that it has no bite. The jokes are lazy and fall flat. There is no rhythm to the film, no sense that anyone here is having a good time. Malaise is an undercurrent that robs the movie of energy. The performances range from the boring to the Ambien-induced, with the movie offering nothing memorable along the way.

In the end, to quote Cowell, it’s hideous.

Grade: D-

On video and DVD

SHOPGIRL, directed by Anand Tucker, written by Steve Martin, 116 minutes, rated R.

Anand Tucker’s “Shopgirl” is about something more compelling and interesting than you might expect. It’s about a May-December romance between Mirabelle (Claire Danes), who works behind a glove counter at Saks Fifth Avenue in Los Angeles, and Ray Porter (Steve Martin), a multimillionaire businessman who made his fortune in the tech industry. It’s also about the boundaries Mirabelle must learn to set if she is to continue her relationship with Porter.

Everything about Ray thrums with irony. He’s aloof yet somehow connected, kind yet self-involved. He is damaged goods holed up in a fabulous house and decked out in more Armani than, well, Armani. When he cruises Mirabelle at Saks and asks her to dinner in ways best left for you, none of it has a whiff of anything insidious because Ray isn’t a creep. He’s just a man with a wary heart, which he tries to explain to Mirabelle as clearly as he can when they fall headlong into their affair.

For a time, it’s wonderful, particularly for this girl from the backwoods of Vermont, whose lonely life heretofore was inhabited by empty rooms and then Jeremy (Jason Schwartzman), a sketchy amp-salesman-cum-font-artist whose own relationship with Mirabelle ended awkwardly.

The movie, which director Tucker (“The Girl with the Pearl Earring”) based on Martin’s adaptation of his own novella, becomes too neat as its relationships do what you know they will do – they cross. Still, when they do, the very reserved, well-bred “Shopgirl” doesn’t make too much of a fuss about it. And maybe that’s why it packs such a tough, sideways punch.

In “Shopgirl,” we learn that life moves on, that love can and does beat within iron hearts, and that people come into and out of one’s life for a reason. There’s nothing new in that, but there is truth to it. It’s how Danes, Martin and Schwartzman handle the familiarity of their situation that makes “Shopgirl” the fine movie that it is.

Grade: B+

Visit www.weekinrewind.com, the archive of Bangor Daily News film critic Christopher Smith’s reviews, which appear Mondays in Discovering, Fridays in Happening, and Weekends in Television. He may be reached at Christopher@weekinrewind.com.

The Video-DVD Corner

Renting a video or a DVD? BDN film critic Christopher Smith can help. Below are his grades of recent releases in video stores. Those in bold print are new to video stores this week.

Aeon Flux – C-

Breakfast on Pluto – B

Brokeback Mountain – A-

Broken Flowers – A-

Capote – A

Casanova – C-

Chicken Little – C-

Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe – A

Classic Musicals from the Dream Factory – A-

The Constant Gardener – A-

Derailed – C+

The Family Stone – D

Flightplan – B-

The Fog (2005) – D

The 40-Year-Old Virgin – A

Fun with Dick and Jane – C

Good Night, and Good Luck – A-

Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire – B-

A History of Violence – A

Hoodwinked – C

Howl’s Moving Castle – A-

The Ice Harvest – B-

In Her Shoes – A-

Inspector Gadget: The Original Series – B-

Into the Blue – C-

Jarhead – B

Junebug – A

King Kong – C

Last Holiday – B

The Legend of Zorro – C+

Lord of War – C

Match Point – A