“The spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the broken hearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound … to comfort all that mourn … to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness.”

-ISAIAH 61: 1-3 KING JAMES VERSION

Not everyone in the Rev. Lorna Stewart’s congregation is filled with holiday spirit.

Sixteen members of the Church of Universal Fellowship in Orono have died in the past 10 months, Steward said Wednesday. Church members individually and collectively are dealing with a deep sense of loss.

Stewart believes that a so-called Blue Christmas service scheduled for Monday evening will help her congregants and members of the community find some solace, if not joy, during the Christmas season.

“There are many people who are not feeling very ‘ho, ho, ho,'” she said Wednesday.

“Many have undergone some life transition and their year has been marked by loss, either death or divorce or a loss of health. They’re just not feeling the festive spirit many people feel this time of year.”

The Orono church is not alone.

Many congregations throughout the state will hold Blue Christmas services, which have grown in popularity over the past decade. Some have scheduled the services to coincide with winter solstice – on Dec. 21 this year, the longest night of the year.

Blue Christmas services may not feature the song of the same name made famous by Elvis Presley. They do, however, reflect the sentiment behind the lyrics, “I’ll have a blue Christmas without you. … Decorations of red on a green Christmas tree won’t mean a thing if you’re not here with me.”

What all the services have in common is an acknowledgment that the secular side of the season often creates expectations that many people feel they cannot meet, that Christmastime for some accentuates what has been lost rather than what has been accomplished during the previous year and that not all holiday memories are the happy ones emphasized in greeting cards.

“Many people experience deep grief and emotional struggle during this very difficult time of year,” the Rev. Carolyn Meltzer, vicar of St. Thomas Episcopal Church in Winn, said Wednesday. “I want to honor that, but I don’t want people to wallow there either. There is hope and light and peace.

“The question is how can we get there without being glittery and tinselly about it?” she said. “I want to honor true hope in the midst of darkness. As a priest, I await the birth of Jesus in Bethlehem. For Christians, he is the light that shines in the darkness.”

In the calendar followed by many denominations, Christmas begins on Dec. 25 with the birth of Jesus and lasts for 12 days until Epiphany on Jan. 6 – the traditional date for the visit of the Three Wise Men to the Christ child. The four weeks of Advent leading up to Christmas Day are not considered to be a part of the Christmas season.

“Blue Christmas is clearly the place where the pastoral realities of real people dovetails with the church’s ability to respond with worship and community,” said Cliff Guthrie, professor of homiletics at Bangor Theological Seminary. “One of the really good sides of the church is its ability to respond in a public way to a private need and to lift that up for public awareness, community building and mutual care.”

Many people, including ministers, experience depression in December, Guthrie said.

“The thing about depression is that it isolates people,” he said. “There’s nothing worse than being told by TV specials and commercials that Christmas is all about family togetherness and friendship and parties when you’re feeling depressed and alone, without family, feeling friendless. If the church says this is normal, then maybe the culture doesn’t have everything to say about what it means to remember Christmas.”

There’s no getting away from expectations around the secular side of the holiday, Meltzer said. As a chaplain at Acadia Hospital, the Episcopal priest learned that society imposes a terrible burden on people around expectations of what Christmas means and what they should be doing to meet those expectations.

“In part, that’s because we’ve gotten away from the whole season of Advent” outside the church, she said.

“Advent is a season of being focused and waiting. Depression is a lot about waiting too. Waiting for meaning to happen, for joy to return, to be made whole. So, it’s very appropriate to have a [Blue Christmas] service in the season of Advent. Advent is not about ho, ho, ho, because Christmas really hasn’t come yet.”

Blue Christmas services

Brewer, First Congregational Church with Grace United Methodist Church, 7 p.m., Dec. 22, 989-7350.

Bucksport, Elm Street Congregational Church, 7 p.m., 469-3333.

Orono, Church of Universal Fellowship, 7 p.m., Dec. 11, 866-3655.

Winn, St. Thomas Episcopal Church, 7 p.m., Dec. 16, 736-2010

A Blue Christmas Home Service

Choose a quiet time and place for the service. Play some soft music in the background.

Set up four candles. They can be any color, but the preferred colors are royal blue for hope, white for wholeness, red for passion and spirit and green for renewal. Each is to be lit individually, followed by a prayer and meditation.

Light the first (green) candle.

I light this candle to remember those persons who have been loved and lost. I pause to remember their name, their face, their voice. (Give yourself time to do this.)

I give thanks for the memory that binds them to me in this difficult season. (Give yourself time to do this.)

May Eternal Love surround them.

Silent time for reflection.

Light second (white) candle.

I light this second candle to redeem the pain of loss: the loss of relationships, the loss of jobs, the loss of health. (Give yourself time to think of each relationship or whatever you are experiencing as “loss” at this time of the year.)

As I gather up the pain of the past, I offer it, asking that into my open hands the gift of peace, of shalom, of wholeness be placed. (Give yourself time to do this.)

May I be refreshed, restored and renewed.

Silent time for reflection.

Light third (red) candle.

I light this third candle to remember myself. I pause and remember the past weeks, months (years): the down times, the poignancy of memories, the grief, the sadness, the hurts, the pain of reflecting on my own mortality. (Give yourself time to do this.)

May I remember that dawn defeats darkness … remember the words written on a wall at Dachau prison – “I believe in the sun even when it’s not shining; I believe in the stars even when I see them not; I believe in God even when I don’t see God.”

Silent time for reflection.

Light fourth (blue) candle.

I light this fourth candle to remember the gift of hope. I lean on the Holy One who shares my life, promises a place and time of no more pain and suffering and who loves unconditionally. (Give yourself time to do this – or substitute any phrasing that will be meaningful for you.)

May I not forget the One who shows the way and Who goes with me into my tomorrows.

Silent time of reflection.

Amen.

Now, head off and do something for yourself – a long leisurely hot bath, a hot cup of tea or hot chocolate, half an hour in the darkness looking at the lit candles and listening to some gentle music – and know that there are people who care.

Source: www.ottawa.anglican.ca/blue.shtml