“The Hulk,” HD DVD: A long-winded disappointment that only finds its footing at the end – but by that time, the film might as well be wearing clogs. This is a movie whose few gripping moments and technically superb set pieces are quashed by director Ang Lee’s decision to give us a character we never really come to know, or, for that matter, care about. With much of the film framed to look like the pages of a comic book, “Hulk” isn’t lacking in style; Lee has the sense to keep the pockets of action interesting and he has the sensibility to make his cartoonish-looking Hulk (Eric Bana) appear graceful, particularly when he leaps across vast terrain and becomes airborne. Still, until the energetic final 30 minutes, the film is too restrained for its own good and it’s never as complex as the computer code that generated it. Rated PG-13. Grade: C-

“Meet the Parents,” HD DVD: The sort of comedy where one can learn how to milk a cat, how to potty train a cat, and how one’s mother’s ashes can be used as a sudden substitute for kitty litter. What surprises is how unforced this comedy is given the tight, often predictable demands of its narrow plot. Director Jay Roach wisely keeps the tension high between Greg (Ben Stiller) and his girlfriend’s father, Jack (Robert De Niro), who would prefer that she not marry Greg, who is humiliated for being a male nurse. The humor comes from this tension and, by extension, from the film’s outlandish situations – such as when Greg, who is Jewish, is asked to say grace at the dinner table, or when it occurs to Jack that if his daughter should marry Greg, her full married name would be Pam Martha Focker. For Jack, that’s unacceptable. For the film, it’s just one of many big laughs. Rated PG-13. Grade: A-

“The Mummy,” HD DVD: Brendan Fraser is Rick O’Connell, a dashing foreign Legionnaire of the 1920s who accidentally discovers the Egyptian city of Hamunaptra. Knowing that buried beneath the city is a fortune in Egyptian loot, O’Connell and company go after it. The catch? The stash is protected by zombies, flesh-eating scarab beetles and the mummy Imhotep. The film has none of the 1932 version’s subtlety – it’s as loud and as showy as a beauty pageant contestant, though not quite as bright. The dialogue is wooden, though the special effects are top notch – this mummy moves. Still, it also is part of the problem – where are the bandages? For those seeking a bit more, this mummy is a bit too dead and buried to suit. Rated PG-13. Grade: C+

“Pearl Harbor,” Blu-ray: It’s Hollywood that dropped the bomb. The film has little interest in Pearl Harbor. In this sanitized, white-washed version of history, what matters is love, the three-hankies sort, which is delivered in prose so purple it might as well be a bruise. At three hours, the film has less to do with exploring the reasons why Japan bombed Pearl Harbor than it does with making a fortune off the contrived relationships slumming at its core. Ben Affleck and Josh Hartnett are two boring flyboys from Tennessee who enlist in the Army and eventually meet Evelyn (Kate Beckinsale), a sexy Navy nurse who steals their hearts. For 90 minutes, audiences are hammered with the banality of their love triangle before finally getting what they’ve come to see – the actual attack by the Japanese. In this respect, the film succeeds, offering a stirring battle sequence that’s well-conceived. Still, the film is so caught up in the nostalgia of the time, it only sees through cheesecloth. This is Hollywood’s response to less angry times. Rated PG-13. Grade: D+

“The Scorpion King,” HD DVD: What saves the film from being just another souped-up box-office hopeful driven by special effects is that it knows what it is – an overblown blockbuster starring Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson as a barely clad superhero seeking peace in the Middle East. Billed as a prequel to “The Mummy” and “The Mummy Returns,” “King” actually is closer in spirit to “Conan the Barbarian” – it stars a well-fed jock, gives him a sword, shoehorns him into a loincloth, and then follows his battle headlong into evil. The movie is junk food, for sure, but it isn’t all salt and grease. It’s surprisingly fun – a big-budget action-adventure cartoon that’s smart enough to wink at itself while also raising one very famous eyebrow at audiences. Rated PG-13. Grade: B

“Snakes on a Plane:” A B-movie extravaganza. While it’s true that it doesn’t have the unexpected spunk of, say, “Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama,” the bloody verve of “Microwave Massacre” and “Redneck Zombies,” or the robust sexuality that makes “Frankenhooker” and “The Gore Gore Girls” so critical to the canon, “Snakes” does have a title that’s as tantalizing as one of the best movie titles ever, “Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death.” As a plus, the movie also is a blast. Armed with Samuel L. Jackson, the film offers hundreds of venomous snakes on a plane whose method of attack is grotesque and imaginative – men shouldn’t stand too long at a urinal, for example, and couples should resist joining the mile-high club. Since the movie plays with the conventions of the genre while also fully employing its rules, it strikes just the right tone throughout. Jackson, in particular, is perfectly cast. Just as good is Julianna Margulies as take-charge flight attendant Clair, who could give Karen Black a run for her money when it comes to how to run a plane thrown into turmoil. Rated R. Grade: A-