In theaters
THE CONDEMNED, directed by Scott Wiper, written by Wiper and Rob Hedden, 116 minutes, rated R.
Well, then, now we have “The Condemned,” in which 10 death row inmates, all from various parts of the world and all on the chopping block for committing any number of atrocities, are sent to a faraway South Pacific island to murder each other. The reason? Naturally, to entertain those voyeurs who dig this sort of snuff and to make its crazed producer a few million bucks in the process.
For their trouble, the last inmate standing will get his or her freedom back, plus some spending money to presumably start life anew. Bonus!
In this case, the one really making the money is visionary producer Ian Breckel (Robert Mammone, awful), who has created the latest in quality, pay-per-view reality viewing. For a mere $50, viewers can stream the island’s stabbings, rapes and slaughterings straight into their computers live via the Internet.
Before you blow you motherboard over that one, get this – the movie, which Scott Wiper based on a screenplay he co-wrote (in crayon?) with Rob Hedden, actually tries to convince us that it not only condemns violence, but that it’s appalled by it. Isn’t that clever? If only. That the movie was produced by World Wrestling Entertainment is just another source of amusement in a film that has some pretty funny ideas about what’s entertaining.
And, goodness, what an entertainment they’ve assembled. Saddled with a time-sensitive explosive device strapped to his/her ankle, each inmate has exactly 30 hours to do their bloody thing or risk either being murdered or blown to bits. As such, the movie wastes no time in getting its grindhouse vibe on and manufacturing ways to make each victim fall like timber.
The WWE’s Steve Austin is the most recognizable face in this melting pot of heathens, and at least he hasn’t lost his sense of humor – he’s allowed a few good one-liners, which he delivers with a likable swagger.
His character, Jack Conrad, works secretly for the government in ways that ironically allow him to come off as the more human of the bunch.
As he rises up against the system, bashing through the movie with the full force of his considerable bulk, the cameras placed around the island record all of it in ways that are so choppily edited, the movie induces a sense of nausea that goes beyond the excessive bloodletting.
In some ways, “The Condemned” feels like a grinding together of “Grindhouse” and the voyeuristic “Vacancy,” with obvious echoes of the television show “Survivor” running throughout. Yet unlike “Grindhouse,” for instance, which winked broadly at audiences while shucking its share of cartoon violence, this movie has an undeniable mean streak that runs counter to its forced stance on anti-violence. There’s no joy to be had here, just death, brutality and revulsion, which the film rails against.
Make sense? Neither does the movie.
Grade: D
On DVD
THE DEAD GIRL, written and directed by Karen Moncreiff, 93 minutes, rated R.
Five stories comprise the heart of “The Dead Girl,” Karen Moncreiff’s disturbing drama that likely will leave those who see it in an unqualified funk.
The movie’s first vignette is “The Stranger,” in which Toni Collette’s Arden, a young woman emotionally abused by her tyrant of a mother (a terrific Piper Laurie, once again soaked in bitters), finds the smashed, decomposing body of a dead girl in a remote field.
Cut to “The Sister,” in which a forensic student (Rose Byrne) unzips the body bag that holds the dead girl, who has a birthmark between her fingers that resembles exactly that of her sister Jenny, who went missing when she was a child. Could this corpse be her sister? Her distraught mother (Mary Steenburgen, never better) demands it isn’t, and an already fractured family continues its slow dissolve into a hollow of emotional disrepair.
Onward to “The Wife,” by far one of the film’s strongest, most haunting stories, in which Mary Beth Hurt’s Ruth, a troubled, God-fearing wreck married to shady Carl (Nick Searcy), uncovers implicating truths about her husband, who might be a serial killer, that lead Ruth to an impasse. Next up is “The Mother,” with Marcia Gay Harden’s mousy Melora working hard to learn what happened to her daughter – whose name we now know is Krista (Brittany Murphy) – by befriending Krista’s roommate, the druggy prostitute Rosetta (Kerry Washington).
It’s their story of unwanted truths that bleeds into the final vignette “The Dead Girl,” with Moncreiff traveling back in time to reveal the mystery of how Krista died. Also a prostitute, Krista is every bit as raw as the cuts that eventually crisscross her hands, wrists and throat. She’s so eager to see her child, whom she gave up because she couldn’t care for her, that she makes a day’s worth of fatal decisions that lead to her own death.
At a critical point in this movie of so much rage, grief and anger, Moncreiff allows Krista a fleeting smile that turns out to be the film’s sole flash of genuine happiness. It fills the screen for only a moment, but it’s nevertheless one reason the film was made. In that unconscious smile is all that was lost within Krista when she realized that her life decisions had become her life mistakes. It’s the reason we care for her, and the reason the movie resonates long after it ends.
Grade: A-
Visit www.weekinrewind.com, the archive of Bangor Daily News film critic Christopher Smith’s reviews, which appear Mondays and Fridays in Lifestyle, and weekends in Television as well as on bangordailynews.com. He may be reached at Christopher@weekinrewind.com.
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