Pandora’s birth control? We’ll see

To be perfectly honest, I’d be happy if this week ended with no more visualizations of 11-year-olds having sex.

That certainly is the image that is being cast since the Portland School Committee’s 7-2 vote to allow the nurse at the public health center at King Middle School in Maine’s largest city to dispense prescription birth control to students there.

The opponents stirring the firestorm have succeeded because I’m sure I’m not the only one who has had to physically shake that picture from my head several times over the past week.

Thursday night, after snuggling through the TV show “Survivor” and dozing through the Red Sox playoff game, my 11-year-old son crawled out of my bed, headed to his own and declared himself ready to be tucked in.

I was tempted to tell him that I already was tucked in. No matter that his bedtime is sometimes later than mine and my husband’s, the tucking-in routine continues even if he has to wake us up to do it.

Two weeks ago, he had his first sort of date night with a girl he sort of favors, his buddy and another close gal pal coming over for a video and brownie sundaes. Everyone was happy and headed home by 10.

That is my very blessed reality.

But it’s not everyone’s, and perhaps no one knows that better than those who work in the fields of education and health care.

Nothing about the Portland School Committee’s vote is comfortable, nor does it appear legally obvious.

While the ramifications of teens having sex was being discussed around the nation’s water coolers, Maine legal and governmental officials were scrambling Friday to determine the legal implications of the school committee’s decision.

While it may be news that a health care clinic at a middle school is able to provide oral contraceptives to students, it is not new that those very same students legally and confidentially have been able to obtain contraceptives at clinics, hospitals or physician’s offices for decades. A minor’s ability to get contraceptives without parental notification was a long and hard-fought battle waged in the 1970s in large part by our city’s own women’s health care advocate, the late Mabel Wadsworth.

Yet in Maine it is legally prohibited for anyone under the age of 14 to have sexual relations with anyone of any age. It is considered sexual assault. Maine also has a mandatory reporting law that requires many professionals such as clergy members, educators and medical professionals to report cases of suspected sexual abuse.

Since legally two 12-year-olds engaged in a consensual sexual relationship would fit the state’s definition of abuse, what exactly is the responsibility of a school nurse, for example, who is aware of such a relationship?

What trumps what?

“We just don’t know,” a seemingly harried Cumberland County district attorney said late Friday afternoon. “I just got off the phone with the Governor’s Office, and there seems to be all kinds of possible issues here. One is HIPPA [the national law protecting patient privacy] and whether that figures in. To tell you the truth, I’ve never had this issue really placed before me. I just didn’t think I’d have to deal with the legalities of two 12-year-olds having sex. It’s just too young, and it’s repugnant to me,” Stephanie Anderson said.

There’s a lot to be debated here, but it would be nice if the discussion could be done with level heads and open minds without the spin of those who simply want to shout that Portland, Maine, is shoving birth control pills down the throats of 11-year-old girls.

As my children grow, I try not to be too naive. I know that the same little guy who cuddles with me on the couch at night talks of things with his friends that he doesn’t want me to know about.

Like any parent, I would like my children to talk to me first when it comes to issues as important as sex. If for some reason they couldn’t, however, it might be nice if there was a kind and educated nurse nearby.

I fall into the camp that doesn’t believe that having birth control available encourages young teens to have sex. I think it helps reduce teen pregnancy and that, after all, is the desired outcome.

There will be a lot of legal and moral discussion going on in the next few weeks, but the most important discussions should be taking place between parents and their kids.

It’s never too early to talk to your kids about sexual activity, and it’s certainly never too late to tuck them in.

Renee Ordway can be reached at rordway@bangordailynews.net.