Barclay’s legacy: Giving gift of letting others give

In today’s world, our society has learned to be ever so cautious. We’re afraid of daring to do … well, just about anything. Teachers no longer hug a crying student. Bosses no longer dare tell an employee that he or she looks especially nice today. One of our most sincere fears, however, is of getting involved. We can’t risk it. Who knows what will happen? This is why the amazing story of Sonya Grenier Barclay has touched so many hearts, not just locally, but at least as far away as Massachusetts and New York, “Old Town woman with cancer has her wish come true” (BDN, May 28).

Sonya is the unlucky recipient of cancer, a disease that still strikes immediate fear in everyone’s heart. Even with the technology we have today – chemotherapy, radiation and a host of drugs – it sometimes simply is not enough. Sonya has been struggling to overcome this disease for four years while at the same time – with her husband, Jeff – lovingly nurturing their four children: Logan, 11, Derek, 8, and the near-twins, Madison, 5, and MacKenzie, 4.

When it was apparent that the outlook of her health wasn’t good, and in all probability would get worse instead of better, Sonya, ever the pragmatist, tried various means of getting her family a new home, as theirs was in need of major repair beyond their budget. It seemed no one was going to listen, no one was going to get involved. Not Extreme Home Makeover, not even Habitat for Humanity. As unlucky as parts of Sonya’s life have become, she has been blessed with having wonderful friends, friends who could be counted on to make “A Wish Come True,” as this project came to be called. The quartet of friends, Sonya, Brandi Folsom, Lana Phillips and Jen Dudley, got together. Jen had connections at WABI, and she encouraged them to do a story; they did. Brandi’s dad, John, talked with her, and they decided that they would do anything they could do to get this project off the ground.

Stan Peterson, a local shop teacher with a lot of building experience, was put in charge of building the structure. John Birmingham, a local businessman, spearheaded the fundraising drive. Jon Gaudet was the “connection man,” who knew all the right people in the building trade, and things started happening.

The truly amazing thing about the project is that it took on a life of its own: for a society that did not want to get involved, everyone suddenly wanted to be a part of it. Carpenters, plumbers, electricians, landscapers, furniture stores, interior designers, painters, mudders, masons – just to name a few – called Stan, instead of the other way around, and asked, “What can I do? When do you need me?”

I was up there a couple of times dropping off food, and I saw dozens of men quietly and efficiently walking from here to there carrying Sheetrock, paint cans, pipes and everything else that goes into building a house, and not a harsh or unkind word could be heard. Mostly men but also some women from every walk of life showed up to volunteer. Joe Cyr, the owner of Cyr Bus Lines, was wielding a broom when I saw him. No one even seemed to notice. He was the norm, not the exception.

In just eight days, a society that simply no longer gets involved got involved. They did so with patience, relentless energy, and most of all compassion. Sonya and her family are moving in to their new spacious four-bedroom, two-bathroom, fabulous home, built and furnished with love and affection for one who could do no more herself.

The true bottom line here, however, is that Sonya has touched parts of us that for many have been long buried. The seemingly busiest, most hardworking people were the first to step up to the plate. Dozens and dozens followed. Sonya’s legacy will always be the gift not that they gave to her but the gift that she gave to them, which was to bring out the very best in all of them, in all of us.

Rosemary Canney of Old Town taught English at Old Town High School for 32 years.