Reporting the story beforehand

Last weekend, when the government of China boasted how its astronauts had begun a long-awaited space mission that would feature the first space walk by Chinese astronauts, the report on the Web site of China’s official news agency, Xinhua, aired hours before their rocket ship had even left the launch pad.

The account vividly described the rocket in flight, complete with a sharply detailed dialogue among the three astronauts. An embarrassed spokesman subsequently explained that the premature report had been posted accidentally, and it was removed from the site.

I mention this novel concept of journalism because, as I sit down to write about the Thursday evening vicepresidential debate between Democratic nominee Sen. Joe Biden of Delaware and Republican nominee Gov. Sarah Palin of Alaska some 12 hours before it occurs, I am tempted to employ the prescient methods of the Chinese crystal ball gazers in describing the event.

The way I figure it, unless something should go terribly wrong at the St. Louis launch site and neither debater experiences liftoff as a result of their soaring rhetoric before millions of television viewers, I should be able to call upon my amazing power of foresight to tell the world what happened hours before moderator Gwen Ifill gets the show on the road.

Because nothing of consequence has ever happened in a vice presidential debate in the history of mankind, I am not too terribly worried that things will blow up on the launch pad. Even though there have been grumblings by some Republicans that Palin should withdraw her candidacy, I doubt she will choose this forum to do so. Nor do I doubt that Biden, knowing how important his performance will be to Barack Obama’s campaign for the presidency, will resist the Bidenesque temptation to unleash the zinger that might come back to haunt.

So in my account of the debate before the debate happens, I would feel safe reporting that both Biden and Palin chose several points that their respective campaigns wished to stress, then tied their answers to questions from Ifill to one of those points, whatever the question. No possible way to go wrong there. (Question: “Should Congress approve the Wall Street bailout plan?” Answer: “What this country needs is a comprehensive energy policy.”)

And without fear of being inaccurate I could write that staffers for each candidate – spinning their version of reality to news reporters and anyone else who would listen – insisted after the debate that their candidate had “won.”

I could write that, in accordance with the teachings of Debating 101, the candidates smiled when disagreeing with each other, did not disagree with any obvious truths that may have been stated by their opponent, allowed for exceptions to their positions by using such words as “often” instead of “always” and “many” rather than “most.”

As well, I could report that they conceded minor or trivial points scored by their rival and seemed to realize that it was not necessary to win every battle in order to win the war.

And then I could actually watch the debate to test my theory that this Chinese-inspired exercise in reporting via divine omniscience may be a journalistic breakthrough whose time has arrived.

Which is what I did. And what did I see happen? All of the above, and more.

The “more” part included the fact that this vice presidential debate, unlike most, was a high-octane affair for the full 90 minutes. Afterward, Republicans the country over were able to breathe a sigh of relief that Palin had not imploded under the pressure of performing on a world stage, as Democrats had hoped. No deer-in-the-headlights look there, as the lady skillfully stuck to her aw-shucks Washington-outsider script and held her own with the more seasoned Biden. Suffice to say, she came through the exercise much better than those around her had expected. Maybe she shouldn’t be written off quite yet.

Biden, who had no easy assignment as the one coming in with high expectations, did not disappoint, either. Knowledgeable, eloquent and gracious, the man showed that he understands that the secret of leadership is finding the parade and jumping in front of it.

Plus he has fantastic teeth.

BDN columnist Kent Ward lives in Limestone. Readers may e-mail him at olddawg@bangordailynews.net.