November 08, 2024
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Local ladies make a toast to N.Y. counterparts

HAMPDEN, Maine – The drinks. The clothes. The shoes. The company.

It wasn’t quite four stylish New York City women together for a night at the hottest bar.

But for 13 Bangor-area women, Friday night at Tanya Pereira’s house in Hampden was as close as they could get.

As main character and narrator Carrie Bradshaw says early in the movie version of “Sex and the City,” which opened Friday, it takes a rare occasion to bring together all types of New York City women. Bangor isn’t exactly New York City, but it did take a rare event for this group of women to leave their husbands and kids home for the night, or step away from work early to change into glamorous clothes.

Pereira’s friends gathered at her home Friday evening for cocktails, followed by a trip into Bangor for the 9:30 p.m. showing of “Sex and the City,” the long-awaited big screen follow up to the hit television series of the same name.

The series, which ran on HBO for six seasons, was about Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha, four best friends all in different stages of their lives but all still struggling to find their way as single women in New York City.

Pereira and her friends certainly weren’t the only group of Bangor-area women who got together to see the movie Friday as it opened around the country. The lobby of the Bangor Mall Cinemas was packed with women, some in jeans and others in their most stylish dresses, who had clearly arranged girls’ night out affairs. For Pereira, however, the movie premiere was really a means to an end – a way to connect two groups of her own female friends, who like the women in the movie are also in different places in their lives.

“It’s sort of a unique combination of women,” she said before the crowd arrived. “I felt like there were two different spheres of women and all just such great and amazing people, that this seemed like the perfect excuse to bring them together, and it seemed like a really, really fun time.”

Pereira, a Hampden native, has a group of friends from her time at Hampden Academy. All had their children about the same time she had her daughter Sophie, now 5.

There were also women there, both single and married, whom Pereira had met through her job with the City of Brewer. They ranged in ages from late 20s to early 40s. Some work full time, others stay at home. There were even two pairs of sisters-in-law, both of which had married brothers.

Their connections? Almost all of them had seen at least one episode of “Sex and the City.” And all of them were just looking for a reason to have a night on the town.

“I can’t tell you the last time I got dolled up,” said Amy Erickson, who lives in Bangor and had her hair done for the occasion. “It’s so fun. And I didn’t even know I was missing it. My [daughters], if they saw me right now they wouldn’t recognize me.”

Although the purpose of the evening was a meeting of friends, Pereira tried to stick close to the spirit of the series (and the movie) in which the main characters often gathered for girls’ nights. The series also often featured big martini glasses, stylish outfits and plenty of funky footwear. That was what Pereira was going for in her get-together.

The drinks? Pereira worked a cocktail shaker in her kitchen, cranking out the SATC signature cosmopolitans, switching to apple-flavored martinis when the cosmo mix ran out. Others stuck to wine or diet soda.

The clothes? Pereira and her friends went all out, with bold patterns or striking colors. Pereira herself, wearing a necklace she found at Goodwill, had a fabric flower pinned to her dress, just like Carrie did occasionally. It was a night to break out the white fishnet tights, pile on the fake pearl necklaces, and take the Burberry bag out of its wrapping.

And the shoes? Everyone got to show off their cutest heels, no matter if those heels came from Payless, downtown Bangor boutique Bella Luna, or Marden’s.

Eventually, the group got around to talking about why the series was such a pull for women.

“We all have that group of friends, and it’s how that group of friends can be an anchor in your life,” said Bangor resident Deb Neuman. “It’s grounding, and I think this movie reflects that. And it kind of reflects what women in our generation are dealing with.”

The group bonded over the importance of having girlfriends – one of Pereira’s friends said she’d rather have good girlfriends than a bad husband – and certainly not for mere shopping partners. Women need to support each other, they said, no matter what they decide to do with their lives.

It’s important to Pereira’s friends that they have people they can call after a long day at the office or struggling with a 5-year-old.

“Historically women are their own worst enemies,” said Kathryn Ravenscraft of Bangor. “We [criticize] each other for staying home, and we [criticize] each other for going to work. There’s no happy medium. But we’re all fabulous.

“Margaret Thatcher said that motherhood doesn’t have to be your whole life,” she continued. “It can be the center, but there is so much more to us.”

They also talked about the four characters who were each meant to represent a different type of woman, from working mom to carefree writer. The beauty of their friends, the women in Hampden decided, is that every one of them has a little Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha in them, and their friends bring that out in them.

Eventually, the group loaded into a 38-foot, 14-seat white Cadillac Escalade EXT Pereira rented for the drive to the theater.

All but the 10:15 p.m. show was sold out by about 9:15 p.m. and the line snaked to the sidewalk outside the building. Once in the theater, the mostly female group hooted and hollered when a theater employee addressed the rowdy crowd.

“Please try to behave yourselves,” he said. “That would be awesome.”

The hundreds of women watching the movie behaved, but rarely stayed quiet. Many cried, laughed and clapped sometimes all at the same time. Neuman’s sister had warned her in a text message earlier in the evening: “The clothes. The tears. Take tissues. Have fun.”

The movie hit not only the right notes for “Sex and the City” fans, but also women out for a little bonding. Romantic love is lost and found in the film, but the love between friends wins out as the message.

After the movie ended, Pereira and her friends piled back into the Cadillac, headed for a downtown Bangor bar in search of more cosmos, to dish on the movie, possibly rest feet not used to wearing high heels for so many hours, and to enjoy their time together.

Who knows when they’ll do it again.

“This is my first girls’ night out since I moved to Maine two years ago,” Brewer resident and Boston native Andrea Small said as she sat in Pereira’s living room. “Thank you, Sex and the City.”

Correction: THIS ARTICLE APPEARED ON THE NEWS WEBSITE. IT DID NOT RUN IN THE PRINT PRODUCT.

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