Democrats gratefully accepted two record-busting checks from soft-money contributors last week as they approved campaign-finance reform: $5 million from Hollywood guy Steve Bing and $7 million from Haim Saban, head of the company that created the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Mr. Saban’s check will go toward the Democrat’s planned $32 million headquarters, to be built entirely with soon-to-be illegal soft money. A new headquarters is needed so Dems will have more room for discussions on the negative effects of popular culture and the plight of the common man.

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Bangor didn’t want to do it and it tried every way it could think of to avoid doing it. But the local-option tax for a new auditorium didn’t fly in the Legislature and the bond question has been whittled down to allowing the city to buy three or four sets of bleachers and some tar for the old roof. Expect delays on Stillwater and Hogan as the new tollbooths are being installed.

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A press release last week from Consumer Action in San Francisco offers the following announcement: “Watchdog group finds that despite an historic low in underlying indexes, APR floors at nine of the top ten issuers blocked their variable rate customers from benefiting fully.” For interested reporters, Consumer Action adds that “Chinese and Spanish speakers available.” No mention of English.

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Voters in Massachusetts were duped, says the attorney for the group Save Our Horses, which wants to ban the slaughter of horses for human consumption. Though they were told they were signing a petition to stop the sale of horse meat, voters actually were signing a question that would ban gay marriage, it is alleged. The compromise is clear: No marriages for horses – and that’s as close as we’ll get to the subject.

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The final report on the Whitewater fiasco, which cost taxpayers $73 million nearly a decade ago, arrived last week without charges against the Clintons but included a charge for taxpayers of $64 million. With that sort of money, Republicans could have built a new headquarters way better than what the Democrats are getting