Ah, to see us as others do.

The Maine Times this week complimented midcoast residents for their choice of living quarters, with a number of awards. The Best of Maine issue had the eminent good sense to mention Guido’s of Rockport as one of the best places to obtain pizza pie. If they hadn’t, I would have ignored the rest of the pages. It would have been a terrible mistake.

The tabloid recommended a number of local attractions and also encouraged Robert Skoglund, the humble Farmer, to run for governor.

MT claimed that Ricetta’s Restaurant in South Portland has the best pizza in the state. I will check that claim next week on the biannual congressional junket, but I believe that distant bistro won on the basis of population, not pasta. MT also nominated Ferrari’s in Camden as a possible. No contest.

Young’s Lobster Pound in Belfast was recommended as a great place to eat lobster along with Miller’s Wharf in Spruce head.

Restaurants mentioned as divine include the Snow Turtle in Waldoboro (sensational fireplace and appetizers), the always crowded Brown Bag in Rockland, Jessica’s in Owls Head, Cassoulet and the Blue Angel in Camden, 90 Main Street in Belfast, and Chez Michel in Lincolnville (my current favorite).

For restaurants with entrees under $10, MT could not afford to ignore Moody’s in Waldoboro.

The Norumbega B and B in Camden won two awards as most romantic getaway and best building from the road (you can go inside for $200 a night). The fabulous Knox Mansion in Thomaston was second for best building from the road. Now maybe someone will paint the place.

The second most romantic getaway was the Samoset Resort, which ought to make Manager Jim Ash happy. But anywhere in Monhegan was the big winner. Other erogenous zones (as if you didn’t know) were Mount Battie and picnicking at Owls Head lighthouse (let’s keep that to ourselves).

Best-view entries include Mount Battie (naturally) plus the brief view of the bay from Route 3 in Belfast.

Favorite names for towns included local entries Liberty, Union, Freedom and Friendship.

Two of the MT favorite bumper stickers were “Keep Maine Green, shoot a developer” and “Will Rogers never met Ted Kennedy.”

Those on the MT “most mispronounced” list included Saco and Mount Desert, plus locals Medomak and Bremen, although Damariscotta should have been there too.

Gardens to see included the Children’s Chapel in Rockport and the sunken gardens in Wiscasset, which I, for one, have never heard of.

Unspoiled villages included Rockport and Damariscotta. Mel Gibson can’t be wrong all the time.

The “tilted bank,” also known as the Waldoboro Bank and Trust, was cited as a favorite sight from along the road. One observer called it a Dunkin’ Donuts box, half open.

Charisma correspondent Peter Clifford said no survey of the midcoast’s “best” should exclude his favorite waitress, Suzette White at O’Neil’s in Camden, lunch on the Waterfront deck in Camden or the Hill House on Eagle Island.

I was shocked by the exclusion of the view from atop Ragged Mountain in Camden, in one category or another. What about Fitzpatrick’s home fries?

Be that as it may, no longer complain about the taxes you pay. Instead count your blessings, Gov. Skoglund.