It started as a low-key, routine exchange in this newspaper’s letters section. A restaurant patron from Burlington wrote that she objected to being asked if she wanted change from the $30 she offered for a $25 check and answered by withholding the tip entirely. A waitress from Bangor responded that, although the ”Do you want change?” question can be annoying, the tip is, in fact, the server’s wage and no one should go unpaid for making one mistake.

The issue of livable wages is important anywhere; in a state of low wages that relies heavily upon the hospitality industry – such as Maine – it is especially important. It is, in fact, an issue that deserves more thought and consideration than two brief letters to the editor. Maine is one of a handful of states that has a special, ultra-low minimum wage for wait staff, a mere $2.58 per hour. Tips, then, are not merely a reward for a job especially well done, but an essential part of making the job worth doing at all.

Tipping has a colorful, albeit vague, history. Some say the practice of handing out gratuities goes back to biblical times, when wealthy travelers would toss coins in the road to buy protection from bandits. The word ”tip” itself may be one of the first acronyms – coin jars in 16th century England taverns were labeled ”To Insure Promptitude.”

A recent study at Cornell University revealed some interesting tidbits about 21st century tipping. Controlled experiments on tipping strategies showed that the tip goes up considerably when the server introduces him- or herself. Stooping for eye contact helps a lot; touching can, too, if done just so. One of the most common complaints among wait staff is that the patron doesn’t tell them something is not right with the meal and then takes out the grudge with a lousy tip. The 15 percent that used to be considered a big tip now is pretty lukewarm. Waitresses who draw a smiley face on the check can expect 5 percent more; waiters can lose 2 percent.

But all the smiley faces in the world won’t help Maine wait staff if the customers don’t realize that, unlike other states and Canadian provinces where the base wage is decent or the tip automatically added, their tip is more than a bonus. Certainly waiters and waitresses must strive to be ever pleasant and efficient, but restaurant owners, if they cannot pay a good base wage, must let patrons know the tip is important.

Patrons, too, must do their part by making their wishes known and not letting one bad moment spoil everything. The alternative will be a self-serve future of plastic cups and paper plates and nobody wants that.